Archive for the ‘Health’ Category

3 Possible Fake News Stories

The Medical Industry is in Bed with Soft Water Companies and Opthamologists

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Trips and Falls

To keep medicine rocking they need business so the soft water folks are working with them to make tubs and showers super slippery. You know what I mean if you’ve ever showered in soft water. You end up doing some kind of weird Michael Jackson dance when trying to get out or in. Just how many people that fall and injure themselves, have soft water?
Plus, they say that you should listen to your favourite song in the shower. To save water, you should be finished when the song ends. With soft water, to get that real squeaky feel to your skin like with hard water, the song should be In-A-Gadda-Da-Vida or any entire Beethoven Symphony.

 

Another group that add to trips and falls, especially for older folks, are the optometrists and opthamologists. These Doctors prescribe Bi-Focals which are now called “progressive lenses”. If you don’t have them, let me explain, each lens is made up with two parts, when you look through the top half of the glass you see normally. When you look through the bottom half everything looks huge, which is good for reading. The question is, do folks wearing progressive lenses fall on stairs more because they are looking through the bottom half?

falling-downThese stairs must look huge. I myself, offer them to my wife when I come to bed (Wink Wink)

Big Brother is Watching???

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Where I live the phone company offers a lot. They offer a TV service with a ton of channels, Phone service, Internet and even home security. So if the police want to find you or find out about you, all they have to do is make one call …to the phone company. They’ll know if you’re home or not home, who you’re talking to, what TV shows you like and what kind of porn you like.

                                                   Your DNA is Under Attack

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Recently I’ve noticed a huge advertising push for DNA. If the cops were to come up to you on the street and ask for your DNA, I’m pretty sure I’d know what you’d say. If a company advertises for your DNA with an offer that they’ll tell you where you came from and what diseases you “might” get, that’s just fine. All you have to do is send them a sample of your DNA and you pay them to do that. One commercial stands out. A lady says, a lot of my friends ask me, what am I? So she sends her DNA in and finds out she’s…asian, indian and whatever. Listen, if you’ve people are coming up to you and asking what you are…you need to find a better group of “friends”, girl.

 
Here it is, you send you’re DNA to a company you don’t know and they send you some pie chart of fluffy information back in the mail. What then, is your DNA kept on file for law enforcement agencies? Is it being used in experiments? Is your DNA being spliced with an alien life form that they captured years before? Oh, and they have them, you know that. I’ve also found out that those DNA kits don’t make the best baby shower gift!

 

This was just a little finger poking fun at some of the “theories” that are out there. So watch out for Fake News because this is the kind of stuff they grab on to.

                                       Always question never accept!

 

Bryan Cox (Radio Host, Comedian, Author and humble guy)

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Top 15 Signs of Age and Aging

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Hey, Baby Boomer so you’re getting older and you don’t know what to expect. Try these on for size.

 

You know you’re getting old….when you can remember the day when you could pronounce all the NHL’s players names, Mahovlich was the hardest. (Canada)

 

When someone offers you a “joint” now you automatically think, ‘would that be a knee or hip?’

 

You order the super TV pack, just because it has the Weather Channel.

 

Back in the day, we remember yelling “Hey, Culligan Man”. Today we know why. He’s the only one that’ll come running when you slip in the tub.

 

Becoming a senior is great, because if you happen to end up in prison, you won’t be getting all those romantic looks from cellblock D.

 

Becoming a senior means you understand you really won’t be getting romantic looks from anyone.

 

Getting older means some bodily functions are like swallowing scrabble tiles. You know one good sneeze, could spell disaster.

 

When you and your buddies wanted to go to the Drive-In. The ones with no money always got in….in the trunk.
You can remember when a “Race Issue” was arguing about who ran the fastest.

 

We finally understand why babies are so cantankerous … plastic and paper underwear.

 

The kids today love the movie”Frozen.” We lived it, always playing hockey on an outdoor rink no matter the temperature. (Canada and Alaska)

 

You end up having to wear Bi-Focals or the new term, Progressive Lenses. This is good guys, everything is so much larger when you look through the bottom half of the glasses. Just make your wife wear them to bed.

 

You remember how our sense of humour was formed around Grade One. OH, how our parents laughed, when you asked for a ride to school. “What are ya kid, some kind of comedian?”

 

Remembering that when you had a job, phoning in fake sick on the weekend was not an option. Your parents made you go to work. Hey, they’d even give you a ride. A ride to school NO WAY but ride to work…Oh, Hell Ya!

 

To the old and young never be afraid to speak out and up. The most important saying you need to know that can apply to so may people and so much in your life, is “Hey, Get Off My Lawn!”

 

You think that the Led Zeppelin cover band performing at the old folks home, should have sang “Stairlift to Heaven.”
   So to the seniors that are feeling shelved, it’s time to get up read a paper, watch the news, learn something new on the computer and most important of all, stay engaged with your surroundings with a sense of humour. Don’t let yesterday use up to much of today.
   To all the kids and grandkids, call you’re parents and tell them you’re thinking of them and you love them, while you still have the chance. Remember you always learn lessons from their past, which gives you the future, where you can apply them.

Thanks for taking the time to read this. If you laughed give it a “like” and pass it on. If you didn’t “Hey Get Off My Lawn”

 

Bryan Cox (Radio Host, Speaker, Comedian and Author)

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100 Monkeys and Climate Change

   If you put 100 monkeys in a room with 100 typewriters, they say, they’ll eventually write the complete works of Shakespeare. This automatically makes me think of the Paris Climate Change Accord.

 

Hamlet

 

I’m a regular guy, not pretending to be some climate change expert. All I really know is that something has to be done. So I watch our leaders susposedly action on the subject. The World Leaders started the conference off telling everyone that they are behind sweeping changes. This was a World scale “Photo-Op”. Then they took off and the worker bees were left to hammer out a deal. Good for them that they all came to a soft agreement.

 

 

The first thing to hit me was the fact that the “have” countries are going to give millions upon millions to under developed countries to help them become greener. Come on, we all know that some of these countries are where kickbacks, pay offs and corruption are a way of life. It’s almost like FIFA is running the Government. So when countries are lining up to give you millions, of course you’re going to say, you want to fight climate change. No one is keeping track of this money.

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I’m confused on one point, some say this accord is not legally binding and some say that it is. All I can say is that, if countries are not going to abide by the rules, there has to be massive repercussions.
How about China? Tons of people are walking around with masks on because of pollution. If the World was to hit China with any kind of action because they didn’t live up to the accord, all they’d have to do is call in a few loans, stop a few manufacturing plants and the World would be screwed. So for all intents and purposes lets call them out of the agreement. That would be like the GOP telling Donald Trump to give up his Presidential bid.

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All this accord does is draw attention to the fact that we have a problem. Congratulations to the World for all agreeing to something but all we can see through all the smoke and mirrors, is it might be too little to late. Now I have to run, and take my VW into the shop for servicing.

 

Bryan Cox (Radio Host, Comedian, Speaker, Author)

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Canada ENDORSES.. Age, Sex and Disability Discrimination

Here it is Canada. Our Federal and Provincial Governments DO support Discrimination based on Sex, Age and Disability.

     I lodged a formal complaint with the Human Rights Commission of Saskatchewan. The complaint was based on the amount that Life Insurance Companies charge for Term Insurance to seniors or almost seniors, the fact that your are male or female and if you have any kind of disability.

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    The older you are, the more you pay etc. Life Insurance Companies have got their butt covered with the help of Government. They get around the law, by saying that the buyer is signing a contract. Life insurance is a Provincial responsibility and every Government prohibits certain contracts because they might discriminate but it seems others are above the law. So it’s up to them to change the law. Here’s the reply from The Saskatchewan Human Rights Commission…
Human Rights reply

    Insurance Companies have been getting away with this law breaking practice forever, but in their case it’s age, sex and disability discrimination. You can hear the insurance companies whining, “well, we base all of our policies on Actuarial Tables”. These tables are the result of exhaustive studies that have been done to more less tell insurance companies just how long people will live and it’s these studies that are the bedrock of the insurance business. As you can see most Canadians choose Term Life contract.
what-life-insurance-policy-do-canadians-have   SO lets say, you were to open a business, where the only way to shop there, was if you had a membership and you only to sell to Asians? You surely would get your knuckles rapped by any Human Rights Commission. By the way, a membership is a contract. Of course you would have done study after study and maybe come up with an Actuarial Table to prove that Asians have a higher annual income than First Nation, White or Black people. Thus proving your contract is valid and you should be able to sell only to those who could, on a constant basis, afford your product.

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   If you are considering launching a complaint with your Provincial Human Rights Commission, I did a bit of leg work for you. I thought this just might be a Saskatchewan problem, so I reached out to all the Human Rights Commissions in every Province in Canada. I wanted to know that if they had a similar laws on their books protecting Life Insurance companies. Manitoba would consider investigating a Life Insurance discrimination complaint. PEI, Newfoundland, Labrador and British Columbia are in line with Saskatchewan and do protect Life Insurance from any such complaint. Alberta said that if the insurance complaint is reasonable and justifiable. Really, good luck with that, because in all matters about insurance are under the umbrella of “Reasonable and Justifiable”. I have to say when faced with a question all of the above Commissions were very good at replying and more than willing to help. At the time of publishing, Quebec, New Brunswick, Nova Scotia and Ontario had no comment. I can’t wait any longer. What, a week wasn’t good enough? You’re SOOOO busy, that you can even answer 1 email? I can only surmise that they have no interest in helping.

    Provincial Governments support the Life Insurance industry in Canada. Thus in turn, they’re supporting age, sex and disability Discrimination. The law, in all provinces is much different when it comes to insurance regarding a job. Discrimination in that case is a huge NO- NO. When it comes to the ordinary joe on the street, sorry we have to put up with it.

   This gives me pause to ask the question, how much do insurance companies contribute to election campaigns?
Someone asked me why the mainstream media hasn’t picked up on this massive scale of Discrimination. The answer is very simple, DOLLARS! The media doesn’t want to bite the hand that feeds. Insurance companies are one of the largest advertisers in the country.

    In my opinion, as this whole article has been, Insurance companies should start by scrapping term insurance or level the playing field for a 20 something to pay the same as a 60 year old person.
I’m so tired to frivolous claims of discrimination and mistreatment. These sometimes lead to lawsuits that are just as frivolous. When you find a true complaint that really hurts folks financially, it’s shrugged off and supported and endorsed by the Federal and Provincial Governments. In their mind it’s not worth it. So, we say to Politicians and the Insurance Industry “Hey Get Off My Lawn!”

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BRYAN COX (Speaker, Humourist, Columnist, Comedian)

Ok, Gave It Up, Call Me A Quitter!

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    Well, it’s been around the 6 month mark of not smoking. After 2 bouts with Cancer, putting up with constant nagging from Doctors, family to good friends, I thought maybe, it’s time. 40 years was long enough. It wasn’t the doctors that got to me. Oh God, their stuff is just getting old. They blame *everything* on the fact you smoke. You walk in with a broken toe because you stubbed it, the doc says…”Well the reason you toe broke is because you probably had smoke in your eyes and couldn’t see where you were you were going…I can’t stress enough, QUIT SMOKING”Blah Blah Blah.

   Damn, I loved it though. I find myself cruising used car lots finding and sitting in the cars that were smoked in. I’m even putting car air fresheners in my meat smoker and letting them slow roast over a pack Benson and Hedges, then selling them on the “I used to smoke” Black Market. I’m kind of in a space like a food addict would be in, when he discovers there’s a food channel.

   Life changes for you and those around you when you don’t smoke. Some good and some bad.

   Loneliness? oh hell ya, No more going outside when it’s -40 making new friends with folks that love to say, “Cold enough for ya”.

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   NOW, I have to be like every other guy on the Planet and fall asleep after SEX, because there’s no more smokin’ SORRY ladies no more chatting.  OK, I can here the jokes…”what no more smokin’, have you looked?”

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  Yes folks, thanks to me band-aid companies will go broke and thousands will be out of job. No more going to pull the cigarette out of my mouth and as my fingers slide down just to have the burning end comes off between my fore and middle finger.

Finger burn

   Yes it will be my fault that the environment will end up in the dumper..no more saving my empties to afford a 15 dollar (Canada) pack of smokes. Yes, this is also a picture of every lonely non smoking Canadian Comedian, in his natural Habitat.

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   One good thing about quiting smoking, is that there is more of an employment opportunity for kids coming out of school …. in the Anger Management field.

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   No more burn marks on my cars back seat. That’s right no more butts being pushed back in the car by the wind when I flick them out of the window. This means we can say GOOD BYE to the Mom and Pop Car Upholstery business.

Cig-burn-to-patterned-seat

   I thought because I owned an iPhone and a Mac computer made me enough of a self righteous ass. Now lets add in, the looking down your nose non-smoker, Holy Crap, pretty soon this will be me. It’s always so nice …above the water.

Walk on water
But back to that Loneliness thing again.

   Come to think of it, I had more friends when I smoked. I think because I was more of an even keel. Sure I make fun of it, but know it’s better for me and everyone else that hangs out around me. This bit, by the way, was only about quitting smoking cigarettes.  Even though I don’t use them any more, I’m still in love with Cigarettes, ….butt soon, very soon I’ll be able to  say to them, “Hey, Get Off My Lawn”.

Bryan Cox,  (Radio Host/Comedian/Speaker/Author/Lover of the Back/Slash

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Politicans Endorse Discrimination and RAPE!

Politicians in the USA and Canada endorse discrimination !! They don’t mind seeing the elderly financially RAPED. Not one politician replied to my inquiries about the discriminatory practices of Insurance companies and Term Life policies.

Even the OmbudService for Life & Health Insurance endorse the discriminatory practices of Insurance companies in Canada, just look at this quote from that office, who by the way, is the office that handles complaints about insurance……
”You are quite right that insurance companies discriminate.  For example, younger people pay lower life insurance premiums than older people (age discrimination).  Since women live longer than men, they pay lower life insurance premiums (sex discrimination).   An individual who has just been diagnosed with an invasive cancer will not be able to obtain medically underwritten life or health insurance (discrimination based on physical infirmity).  And, older experienced drivers pay lower car insurance premiums than teenagers (again, age discrimination)”.

Insurance Companies have been getting away with this kind of practice forever, but in their case it’s age, sex and disability discrimination. You can hear the insurance companies whining, “well, we base all of our policies on Actuarial Tables”. These tables are the result of exhaustive studies that have been done to more less tell insurance companies just how long people will live and it’s these studies that are the bedrock of the insurance business.

So if the success of a business can be directly linked to a “study or studies” why haven’t other businesses done that?
For example, if you want to base a business on studies the biggest boy on the block is the US Census. As a future business owner one of the things to look at, is who can afford your product. One might even base your sales on selling to those people with the highest annual income.

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It looks like Asians make more annually than the rest of us. How far do you think you’d get if you put up a sign that said, “Only Asians Served?” You’d be brought up in front of a Human Rights Board. Which is, shock of shocks, common sense and the LAW.
With fewer and fewer folks having a retirement nest egg these days, it only makes sense that more folks will be living off of our countries old age pension systems. After looking up what an old age payment would be from many sources, in the US and Canada the average monthly government paid old age income would be around $1200.00 dollars per month. In some cases it might be more and some, less. If you retire at age 65 let’s look at what term life insurance will cost you on average

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                                                                                                                                 This is Discrimination based on age and sex.
By doing NOTHING politicians are endorsing this Age and other forms of Discrimination. Plus support the financial rape of the elderly. With elections looming this is not good practice for any politician. These insurance buyers are the folks that want to leave something for kids and grandkids. Even to be able to afford a funeral. Sure they bought life insurance, but life insurance is something you buy and forget. Believe me, when you’re slammed with a 600 dollar per month payment that jogs your memory pretty fast. No one can real afford that so…you cancel. You might look at other forms of insurance, but by the age you’ve reached by now, they all cost much more. It’s eye opening what Term Life will cost you in Canada anyway http://www.insurecan.com/ The USA is about the same as well.

Selling Term Life policies means that Insurance Companies are breaking the law. If company is caught making a profit off of consumers, by running an illegal operation. That company is usually told by the courts, to pay back all money.
In my opinion, since Insurance companies have been running a business based on, human rights stated, Discriminatory Practices, they should have to return all money paid to them by anyone that ever had a term life policy and change the way you do business so it’s fair for all.
You might ask why the media hasn’t jumped on this blatant law breaking. It all comes down to “don’t bite the hand that feeds”. Insurance companies are some of the biggest advertisers on the air and in print today.
Insurance companies as you’re laughing all the way to the bank just remember to …”GET OFF MY LAWN”

BRYAN COX…..Radio Host/Speaker/Author/Comedian/Lover of the Back-Slash/

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